The Comet Guy

- You can predict an AIRPLANE.
- If you respect an AIRPLANE it will be good to you.
- AIRPLANES don’t have PMS to battle.
- AIRPLANE skin doesn’t wrinkle as badly.
- An AIRPLANE won’t criticize your performance.
- An AIRPLANE doesn’t care where you were last night.
- AIRPLANES don’t cost as much money.
- AIRPLANES don’t get pregnant.
- AIRPLANES are faster than most women.
- AIRPLANES don’t take forever to warm up.
- AIRPLANES don’t spend hours in front of a mirror.
- AIRPLANES like to do it inverted.
- AIRPLANES won’t keep you waiting.
- AIRPLANES won’t insist you shower before entering it.
- AIRPLANES don’t cry when you break up with them.
- AIRPLANES don’t talk back.
- AIRPLANES don’t get headaches.
- AIRPLANES don’t take half of everything.
- AIRPLANES never stand you up.
- It’s easier to get “trim” in an AIRPLANE.
- AIRPLANE go down … women just bring you down.
- An AIRPLANE is cheaper to maintain.
- You can’t get diseases from an AIRPLANE.
- AIRPLANES don’t care if you fart.
- AIRPLANES have better struts.
- An AIRPLANE doesn’t care who yanks it’s stick.
- You can keep an AIRPLANE from stalling.
- AIRPLANES can be turned on by a flick of a switch.
- You can approach an AIRPLANE from the REAR.
- You can proudly show your AIRPLANE inside and out.
- An AIRPLANE won’t slap you for being a “bush pilot”.
- An AIRPLANE doesn’t ask you to put on a raincoat before entry.
- You can easily leave an AIRPLANE before sunrise.
- AIRPLANE exhaust fumes smell better.
- AIRPLANES lose weight faster.
- You don’t always have to “hand prop” an AIRPLANE.
- AIRPLANES don’t care if you fall asleep while in them.
- AIRPLANES don’t care if you enter thru the back door.
- An AIRPLANE does not get mad if you “touch and go”.
- An AIRPLANE will not get mad if you ride someone else’s airplane.
- An AIRPLANE’s cockpit is cleaner.
- At least a DC-10 sucks!
- You can calculate the peak performance of an AIRPLANE.
- An AIRPLANE is easy to roll over.
- You can still ride a fifty year old AIRPLANE.
- Up to five people can ride in an AIRPLANE.
- AIRPLANES last longer.
- AIRPLANE’s don’t need as much lubrication.
- AIRPLANE’s don’t droop after ten years.
- AIRPLANES are easy to love.
- You don’t have to sweet-talk an AIRPLANE.
- You can always tell when an AIRPLANE is going to give out.
- An AIRPLANE moves when you tell it to.
- AIRPLANES give a better ride for the money.
- An AIRPLANE goes anywhere you direct it to.
- Wide body AIRPLANES are more attractive.
- An AIRPLANE will kill you quick…a woman takes her time.
- An AIRPLANE takes less time to turn around.
- An AIRPLANE does not object to a preflight inspection.
- AIRPLANES don’t make you “pull-out” to eject.
- You can change the looks of an AIRPLANE.
- AIRPLANES come with manuals.
- AIRPLANES can handle thrust better.
- AIRPLANES don’t scream.
- A 747 can keep you up for 14 hours.
- You can adjust an AIRPLANE’s attitude easily.
- Women have more drag than lift.
- An AIRPLANE’s payload can be calculated.
- AIRPLANES have strict weight and balance limits.
- AIRPLANES have ash trays and tray tables.
- Sometimes you can ride AIRPLANES for free
- It’s easier to understand what an AIRPLANE needs.